Do you think that you need to take some action to cover that snowy, faded, pale stuff up on top your head (and we’re not talking about last year’s winter cap)? Helen Mirren may get away with it, but if you want to work in corporate America, the gray stuff still seems to be a puzzler to a lot of people. Is it a sign of wisdom? Maybe for the guys (à la George Clooney ). But we are still an unaccepting society where, at times, white hair equals “old lady.” You can dash up your style with trendy scarves, a sleek mid-length haircut, or a well-tailored suit. But if you are in your 50s with a mane of gray, you must consider the reality that the potential boss may be concerned that you are a frail, short-timer.
A Brief Hair History
- You are 25ish. Your best friend is staring at your head. She says, “What’s that? A gray hair!?” You shriek, “Pluck it! Pluck it!”
- You are 30ish. You have this amazing shock of white hair, up in front on the right side amidst long, dark brown tresses. People come up to you and ask, “Did you do that, or is it natural?” You grin (again) and answer, “Oh, it’s natural alright.” “Wow! That is so cool,” they say. You saunter on and chuckle.
- You are in your 40s. You are way past counting the grays. If you pluck them, you will be left with about 30 scrawny dark sprouts. But you have a pert, short cut. You are trim and fit. At a restaurant, a woman approaches you, “I love your hair! Is that natural?” You admit it is.
- You are 50-something. You have this crop of whitish, grayish hair. You use a special purple shampoo and conditioner to keep the yellow from creeping in. Your hair is wiry. It is dull. You have the memory of your husband mistaking you for his mother at a family gathering (well, at least you can remember). You frequently get the senior price at the grocery store. You are at a women’s meet-up and seated next to your sister. She is a few years older than you. You are introduced to a woman across the table. This woman points to your sister and blurts out, “And this must be your daughter?” (Gasp!)
When Should You Dye Your Hair?
You are looking into the mirror at this white-haired, sort-of-saggy-faced woman, and you’re thinking, wistfully, “If I can just hold on to this X#@ job for 10 more years! And if maybe there still is Social Security and Medicare and my pension...” But then you are called into the boss’s office, and you are (almost literally) tossed out like a banana! After you pick yourself up and wipe off the grime, you find yourself on the potholed, dusty road in the Land of the Job Seekers where the unemployed compete for new jobs from new employers.
While you are slogging along, wiping your tears or making rude jesters (whatever helps), you think, “I have to plan.” Sometimes you rearrange your thoughts to declare this ordeal an “adventure." This technique helps to keep your mind off the "job filled already" cliff, the resume swamp and the rejected pit. But then you look back at the gray-haired soul in the mirror. She blinks back at you, and you mumble to yourself, “I gotta do something about this hair!”
Now, I’m not saying that tinting your hair to a more acceptable, younger person’s color will indeed land you a job. But it will definitely boost your confidence, a key ingredient for selling your skills and experience.
Of course, if you are looking for a job, you will more than likely have to do the dying yourself, and that is truly a chore. Make a date with a friend (hey, even your older sister) to have a spa day, including a light lunch. The chore turns into a treat. The road gets smoother. When you finally do find that job, you can always sneak that gray back. Unless, of course, you like the new you!
Jean Blanc - I am the mother of two young men and the wife of a much older one. I have spent about 30 years of my life working in an office. In my ...
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